Friday, 12 August 2011

What caused the riots?

Criminality; police inaction; police overreaction; not enough police; police bureaucracy; police holidays; multicuturalism; "ultra-feminism"; the decline in religious observance; knife culture; gang culture; the class divide; left-wing socialist dogma; right-wing free-market dogma; Blackberry messaging; parents' unwillingness to discipline unruly children; adults' fear of children; comprehensive education; absent fathers;

Twitter; urban stress; the breakdown of respect; lack of suitable role-models; inherent lawlessness of youth; boredom; hopelessness; emotional impoverishment; hand-wringing Guardianistas; unemployment; racism; the withdrawal of educational maintenance allowances; social inequality; opportunism; police turning a blind eye to petty crime and vandalism; social exclusion; Harriet Harman; English culture; feral youth;

official undermining of adult authority; tax avoidance by the rich; "moral anarchy"; decades of posturing by liberal elites; television coverage; the herd mentality; brain chemistry; mirror neurons; poor nutrition; unrealistic expectations; no expectations; lack of self-esteem; too much reliance on CCTV; not enough CCTV; stop and search; the Human Rights Act; Facebook; alienation; ineffectual social services; lack of police access to rubber bullets, tear-gas and water-cannon; single motherhood; teenage pregnancy; "polygamy"; mindlessness; "lives of absolute futility"; political disengagement; greedy bankers; pyromania; inadequate supervision; reality TV; police budget cutbacks; political correctness;

New Labour's record in office; the Coalition; the Sixties; welfare dependency; welfare cuts; the abolition of caning; inadequate housing; homelessness; fecklessness; crime-ridden housing estates; the school holidays; rap music; consumerism; inability to distinguish between right and wrong; MPs' expense claims; hereditary joblessness; testosterone; ADHD; lack of anger-management teaching in schools; lack of discipline in schools; "horribly feminised" schools; truancy; soft sentences; ASBOs; hoodies; hugging hoodies; the weather; face-coverings; the exhilaration of crowds; envy; greed; sexual frustration; the condition of England; Ken Livingstone; Boris Johnson; footballers' salaries; footballers' behaviour; shit happens; somewhere in Texas, a butterfly flapped its wings.

Have I missed anything?

P.S. I had reckoned without Dr David Starkey's remarkable suggestion on Newsnight that it was all to do with the adoption of "black culture" and Jamaican patois by white working-class chavs.Truly, the possibilities are endless.